You might ask me “Does it seem that Christmas comes earlier every year,” and I’d say, “No, you stupid worthless piece of shit, they jut put the shit in stores earlier every year.” You might then say, “Well, it’s kinda nice to see them liking Christmas so much, right Chris?” and I’d say “Oh yeah! They love Christmas SO much! Bullshit, you gullible bastard. They love it as much as I love rap music! They only love the money that comes with it, it’s all marketing, only thing the holidays means them is *Plays sweet bass line* MONEY!” And you might then say “But it’s not just the stores, people are decorating thier house for Christmas in November.” Then I’d be forced to say “Yeah, and they put the shit in stores before HALLOWEEN! You’re a dumb one. They’re selling it because IT’S THERE. They’re trying to give off something of a GET IT BEFORE IT’S GONE, IT MIGHT NOT BE HERE NEXT TIME feeling. LIMITED TIME OFFER! GET ‘EM WHILE THEY’RE HOT! GRAB IT BEFORE IT’S GONE! It all goes back to that marketing thing.” Then you’d call me a douche bag who kills Christmas spirit and I’d kick you in the fucking nuts and spit on you.

So yes. It’s November. The Grinch has already been on TV. WHAT THE FUCK?! People are already putting up Christmas shit, They’re worse then the October 1^st Neighbors. Stop. Now. Motherfuckers! It’s only November. No reason to make your asshole relatives see your stuff TWICE a year. (Thanksgiving and Christmas for you dumb folks.)

But lets not forget, Christmas Sells all around. Not just for stores, channels start the Christmas shit early, good rating you know. That’s why people like me have to sit through shows like Frosty the fucking Snowman, along with Frosty’s Winter Wonderland, and Frosty and Rudolph and Frosty Returns, and the Legend of Frosty, and Frosty rapes a 6 Year old and Frosty wanks it in the men’s room, all fucking December 25^th. Not to sound like Scrooge, but I can only see the same shitty, late 60’s/early 70’s shit animation so many times before I snap. Fuck that. Besides. It’s all about “A Christmas Story”. Hell yeah.

I’m done.